IS me.

jamie lee is back in action.i start crap here now.Life in acs ipoh and taking my f6 is really really a hard pathway to walk on.I meet the wrong MR.right which i thought is the right one for me in the 1st place.silly huh.Life starts with all the hardworks and start forgetting my ns friends.everyone busy-ing themselves in life.but i admit i miss my ns life since it help in dieting..XD getting more rounded these days..

blogku..HE deleted me from his friends list.am i that irritating for him until he have to delete me?i miss the HE that i used to know.not the HE now.i'm so scared as if he is a totally stranger to me now.life is very funny.
we are strangers and then we become friends.from friends we become lovers.after lovers we become enemy and not we are stranger.
life is like a big round circle.everything is there.up and down all the times.is like one minute i am fine.one minute i'm not.
i miss the smiles.the kisses.the touch and the care.
one hand can't make any sound.i missed.but did HE?
i wonder is almost 3 months we ended everything yet it felt so close and fresh to me.just like it happened yesterday.we being together for 23days and it is a short period of time.i know the are not much things and memories there.but it is a valuable relationship i once had.1st time being pampered and spoilt by the one i love and cared.HE gave me alot of 1st time in my life.
HE is not handsome.not rich.not smart.suck voice.good at nothing bad in everything.

BUT

he have a heart to care.arms to hug and warmth.lips which kills the tears.sweet talk that can melt the sun.

he is a great guy.i don't want to remember the bad of him.in my head.i just want to keep the positive thoughts of mine about him.at least.one day when i sit down and recall my memories.i will be SMILED for he had been came through my life ONCE.
thanks for being there to care.memories.and hate me now.
let HER be your ANGEL.and i be the demon.is your wish.

*faker
*bitch
*not sincere.

[three words that YOU had categories me in front someone]

i don't really mean it when i say.
[YOU ARE JUST ONE OF MY UNWANTED TOYS]



i was figuring ways to get your attention.



-et the unspoken being sealed-

dear blog..2day i tought i gonna have a great day in jusco with vivian..mun..kok king..at 1st it was fun hanging out at there..and yet we watched movie..after watch movie..i went to toilet and i bounce to mrA with a girl right beside him..that girl was the one whom send him off to kem on the 1st day..i wonder what is their relationship was..i think i dont have the right to interfere his own life..i dont even have the right..he went out also din tell me..who am i lahh...to care about his social life??ryte?he did explained..and ask me whether i'm angry or what..haix..obviously i am angry and jealous..

jamie lee..jamie lee..wake up..will a great guy fall for u??pleaase la..mirror urself..my dear..wad qualification u have?u're bad in studies..u have no body shape..not good looking..poor in sports..wad else can u compare urself to that gal..u totally kalah terukk...aiks..

2day mun bek to ipoh le..ate baskin robbins with her..she look much more mature n fair..wish to have a close close friendship with her like last time..can we?hope we can le..i miss our silly times..^^

mrA sms me le..ask me y look so down?he might dont know wad am i thinking..maybe like he say..i terlalu luen luen lei..v jz frenssssss....

i'm not gud in leiture people..but i know i am a good listener..
hope i can accompany him when he is down..^^
bek to kem 2ml le..

-end of 30/4/2010-

national service life..

1st day stepping my leg to kem rimba taqwa sik,kedah..when i starts find my dorm..it rains heavily..silly me bring all my luggage go all the way up and find my room..when i managed to find it..i realised that there's not bed and locker for me..omg..feel like banging my head to the wall..
there are lotsa problems when i reached the kem..
-no water..
-monkeys with itchy hands which steal inner wear..
-floods in my room
-my room damn far
-the foods sucks
-the pathway is narrow
-i couldnt bath due to dirty water

sooner..i get to know alots of friends in the kem..i even meet someone i had a crush with..i dont know what is that guy feelings towards me..but i swear..i really keep on eye on him no matter what he do..even the way he stand..funny

i had gone through alot in kem..i get to learn what is cooperate..i'm so touched that people around me cared me alot eventhough we aint close that much..when i faced problem in breathing..i felt warm even though i'm scared with my own situation..i can sense people around me trying to help me..waste their energy and time to take care of me..thanks ah bing..and ah ngai..and mr.A

i did fever in kem too..so shameless..in ipoh din fever..go kem for national service go fever pulak..adui..the nurse din check my temperature and din even give me any medicine..gosh..i depend on myself to recover myself n lower down my body temperature by bath n drink more water..so brainless..

i pass motion with blood for 4 days..on the 5th days..i was sent to hospital..and then nurse took a syringe to take my blood..after take my blood..my whole body was pening pening and pale..i'm fobia with blood..even my own blood...geli lo..i vomitted also..mr.A text me after i came back from hospital..felt warmth again by him..easily get touched by his silly acts..or either i am the one who think too much..he also made hand language [ILOVEYOU] to me..awww...sweet de..
*p/s:i dont hope i'm the one who think too much.*

staying at kem make me feel warmth..eventhough every morning i have to wake up early and do exercise by running up n down hill..pt so many times..sit up..push up..yoga..i admit i gonna miss it when i end this national service..it aint as bad as othas ppl say..seriously do it..and u gonna enjoy the process of living in there..

me..living like myself at there..silly de..playfull de..rude de..no girlish style at all..but i kinda shocked that someone told me that..i'm not a faker..i'm just being myself..i was shocked that someone that i know less than 1 month can say out my real character..


29/4/2010


today i was suprised..kinda touched..hanging out with *him cause ah yin n ah ngai ffk me..chris n annie was late to join me..*he fetch me from the store n go to parade..v ate in kopitiam..in a surprise..both of us ordered the same meal..gosh..never expect this to happened..den v walk in popular n every single cd shop in parade..*he ahh..no manners..keep on gap lui..ish ish ish..i yau tam sum he will bored wo..walking with me..feel like cubit his ears kuat kuat..hahaxx..ganas wei..well..sending him off really make me wanna cry..it seems like my heart heavily seeing himgoing off..*he pulak kip on luk into my eyes ensuring me that he is going off le..when the times he should look at my eyes..he dont look..ng sai him look..he look look look...ishh..after i turn around and walk away..he called me..goshh...so sweet la wei..*he just like a killer for girls..XD XD XD asking me to bcarefull..and telling me dat he is going off le..owhh..
so hope that i can follow him..i enjoyed sitting behind him..eventhough i didnt hug his waist..argh..such a waste!!stupid de me..*u*
[i hope that there's more opportunity between us again]


well gonna end now...

i might sleep now..
the journey today ends..
bt it doesnt meant that the memories dies..
^^